“What the hell does ‘taking yourself out with food poisoning’ even mean?”
While I was still reeling from this completely unexpected turn of events, the car arrived at a cemetery halfway up the mountain. We hadn’t called an ambulance. After all, considering what they’d eaten, it was hardly surprising.
The dried squid Ayano had made herself. Honestly, I wasn’t even sure if the stuff had actually been squid to begin with.
『Kyaaah, over here! Hehehehe! Ah, imagine we’re playing tag on the beach!』
After getting out of the car, I followed Reona’s telepathic messages to the scene. True to form, she was taking things at her own leisurely pace.
We rushed into a grove of trees beside the cemetery. There, we found a group of cosplayers dressed in kimono and eboshi hats sprawled across the ground. They clutched their stomachs, writhed in agony, and foamed at the mouth. A quick count put their numbers at around twenty.
“Yoshito-kun… You came… for me…?”
Reona stood beneath a cherry tree in her shrine maiden outfit, creating an atmosphere straight out of a confession scene in a school romance.
I decided to ignore her. We had more pressing matters to deal with.
When I turned my attention to the man lying closest to me, I noticed something bizarre happening. Something was squirming around inside his abdomen.
“《Hardening Spell》—《My Fingernails Are Blades, So Strip, You Bastard!》”
With my nails reinforced by magic, I ripped open the man’s hakama.
“Whoa…”
Shizuku, who had arrived a little later, let out a voice of admiration.
“I’’d love to have my clothes taken off like that, too…”
You know the kind of fanservice scene you see in anime, right? A monster tears a girl’s clothes to shreds, revealing tantalizing glimpses of the skin beneath. Of course, the important bits are obscured by a mysterious beam of light, so please purchase the DVD or Blu-ray for the uncensored experience.
Oh. Maybe it was because I’d been thinking about something so utterly irrelevant, but my hand slipped.
Rip!
I tore the man’s clothes all the way down to his waist, and his thing popped right out.
Phew. Everyone, relax. Thanks to that mysterious beam of light, I can’t see a thing.
Anyway, putting that aside, something strange was happening to the man’s stomach. The area around his solar plexus had swollen up, and beneath his skin, something resembling a sea anemone was wriggling and squirming away.
Well, I guess men can get pregnant in the twenty-first century, huh?
Just kidding.
“《Analysis Spell》—《What I Seek Is the Reason for Your Suffering, So Let’s Play Doctor, Hehehehehe!》”
I channeled magic into the man’s body and quickly assessed his condition. As expected, the culprit was the dried squid. It had somehow come back to life (!?) inside his stomach and was continuing to grow while devouring the lining of his stomach.
There was absolutely no way that thing was ordinary dried squid.
I activated [Appraisal].
| [Name] Ayano’s Homemade Dried Squid (Tentative) [Gender] Female [Race] Evil God Familiar [Age] 12 minutes [Title] Stomach Devourer [Stats] ∙∙∙∙∙∙∙∙∙ Level: 0 ∙∙∙∙∙∙∙∙∙ Attack Power: 1 ∙∙∙∙∙∙∙∙∙ Defense Power: 1 ∙∙∙∙∙∙∙∙∙ Vitality: 1 ∙∙∙∙∙∙∙∙∙ Magic Power: Unmeasurable ∙∙∙∙∙∙∙∙∙ Mental State: Frenzied ∙∙∙∙∙∙∙∙∙ Agility: 1 [Abilities] Familiar : Magetsu Zeyadafoa Ayano Guireya [Skills] Proliferation II [Magic] Temporal Spell, Clockly (Always Active) [Status Ailment] In Madness State Logic of Madness: I’m supposed to become nourishment for Yoshito-kun… No, no, no! I don’t want to be digested by a guy like this! Wait—I know! I’ll just eat him from the inside out and get out! I’m such a genius! |
Uh… Could I just pretend I never saw that?
Especially the part about “the Logic of Madness.”
That said, if I left things as they were, people would probably die. And I definitely wanted to avoid that. As long as I kept the Takasu family members alive, I could make them spill the beans about their connections, or use them as bargaining chips in negotiations. Heck, I could even turn them into my puppets with a little mind hacking.
All right. First, I had to do something about this dried squid. Unfortunately, neutralizing the 《Time Spell》 was going to be a little difficult while I was stuck in a child’s body.
Which meant—
“Shizuku, I’m counting on you after I pass out.”
“Huh?! O-Okay!”
After giving her a quick word of warning, I took a deep breath.
“《Time Spell》—《The Black Knight Keeps Transforming from Somewhere Far Away into Somewhere Around Here in Every Scene Except Combat, Then Returns》”
My full-power state, limited to three minutes.
I transformed into the Black Knight.
“《Demon-Banishing Spell》—《You Lot Belong Back Inside a Proper Man, So Get the Hell Out of His Organs! Seriously, Who Even Wants This?!》”
First, I made the dried squid disappear. Then—
“《Stomach-Medicine Spell》—《May These Stomach Linings Be Well Cared For and Rise Again as Many Times as Necessary》”
I restored the man’s stomach, which had been ravaged by the creature.
Healing magic wasn’t exactly my strong suit, but when I focused it on a specific area, I could still pack a decent punch.
“It’s been a long time, hasn’t it, Shizu-Shizu?”
“Y-Yes… It certainly has…”
Behind me, Reona had started chatting with Shizuku. Judging by their exchange, the two of them seemed to have known each other for quite some time.
“Shizu-pon, what’s wrong with you? You used to talk in a much more haughty manner! Come on, do your signature routine! You know, ‘I am Shizuku, the Fallen Angel of the One Silver Wing! Descendant of the Noble Heavenly Ones, Pursuer of the Scarlet Red Destiny!’ ”
“Uuugh…”
I glanced over at Shizuku. Reona was dredging up her painfully embarrassing past, and she looked like she was on the verge of tears.
I’d have liked to help her, but I am now busy saving lives. Sorry about that.
“Come to think of it, I heard you’re attending high school now. Have you made any friends yet, Shizu-nyan?”
“Umm… I’ve only attended the entrance ceremony so far…”
“What a leisurely attitude! You know, those people known as Riajuu—the socially successful, romantically fulfilled types—make friends on social media before school even starts. After the entrance ceremony, they head straight to a hotel together, and by the following week, they’re getting punched by their partner’s parents! And yet you, of all people, aren’t getting all lovey-dovey with anyone? What is the world coming to?”
“S-Sorry…”
This had absolutely nothing to do with making friends anymore. Nevertheless, overwhelmed by Reona’s relentless momentum, Shizuku found herself bowing her head in apology.
“There’s no need to apologize. Show your sincerity through your actions instead. For example, by pinning Yoshi-kun down or something.”
“Y-Yes…”
Oi, don’t drag me into this.
And Shizuku, please stop nodding along!
“Anyway, since we’ve met here, it’s time for the hundred ghost stories! And while we’re at it, why don’t I expose the Takasu family’s schemes?”
Isn’t that supposed to be ‘the hundredth year,’ not ‘the hundred ghost stories’?
Actually, now that I thought about it, Reona had been spilling the inside story just as freely during the kidnapping incident.
…Right. I’d better add her to my list of people who should never be told anything important.
＊ ＊ ＊
In a way, the story Reona told was downright terrifying.
Apparently, the Takasu faction had planned to make Shizuku disappear without a trace, then claim, “The Byakuya faction must have made a move to prevent us from getting closer to the Asaki faction!”
After crushing the Byakuya faction, they intended to shift the argument toward another accusation: “It’s suspicious that the Asaki faction failed to notice the Byakuya faction’s underhanded schemes.”
In other words, the Takasu family had been aiming to eliminate their rivals and emerge as the sole winner.
“As for my role in all this, you could say I was something of a mercenary.”
Having spilled every last detail and gotten it off her chest, Reona looked thoroughly satisfied.
“I was planning to help the Takasu faction out as a little favor, given our connections. But then I heard that Yoshi-kun might be coming to Kyoto, and I thought, Well, coo-coo-coo-coo, that’s the end of that! Oh, and for the record, that’s pigeon-speak for ‘Nope, no way this is gonna work!’”
Now, then. I’d finished treating all twenty victims at just that moment. Two minutes had already passed since my transformation, and the backlash is growing considerably worse.
A voice from my past echoed from the depths of my soul.
(Not content with a stepsister, you’ve gone and built yourself a harem full of yanderes and chuuni weirdos, too! You little bastard!)
If I let my guard down for even a moment, I might just tear off my own you-know-what out of sheer frustration.
“By the way, I did promise you before, didn’t I? That I’d eventually join your side, Yoshi-kun. So, well, I decided to give the Takasu faction a taste of their own medicine this time.”
Reona wore an expression that practically screamed, “How’s that for a masterstroke?”
A breeze swept through the grove, sending cherry blossom petals fluttering gently to the ground.
“Then… does that mean you’re on our side, Reona-san?”
Shizuku asked.
“Why, yes. Of course.”
Reona nodded firmly.
And then—
“—Well, that was a lie.”
“Somehow, I had a feeling you’d say that….”
A blade rang out with a sharp, metallic clang.
Kaminagi Reona had drawn her katana with virtually no warning. Her speed had improved even further since our last encounter, so much so that the naked eye could barely follow her movements.
Even so, it was within the realm of what I’d expected.
I drew my own sword and deflected her strike.
“So, you saw through me?”
“I merely considered it one possibility.”
What was it that Kaminagi Reona wanted most of all?
A fight to the death with me. But not some honorable duel fought by the rules. Last time, she’d launched a surprise attack without a second thought, after all. She was the type who wouldn’t choose victory even if it meant winning.
In other words, there was every chance she’d use the Takasu faction’s food poisoning incident as a decoy to catch me off guard. Ideally, I could have cast 《Binding Spell》 on her the moment we met, but I simply couldn’t find an opening.
“Now then, Yoshi-kun. How much longer do you think you can maintain that form?”
Reona asked as she swung her katana.
Honestly, I had to admire how she could keep talking without biting her tongue, even in the middle of a fight.
“I’ve been thinking about it ever since our last battle. What would it take for me to defeat you?”
This is bad. I am being completely overwhelmed. Part of it was that Reona had grown stronger since the kidnapping incident. But more importantly—
The 《Mud》 inside my body was trembling in fear.
“Your movements are sluggish.”
Reona sounded as though she’d expected exactly this.
“Shall I tell you why? That form of yours must be borrowing the power of some kind of god, wouldn’t you say? And I am Kaminagi, the God-Slayer. In terms of compatibility, this couldn’t possibly be a worse matchup for you.”
“Shit…!”
Inside my armor, a bead of cold sweat trickled down my face. She got me. At this rate, I might actually have been better off not transforming in the first place.
Should I revert to my child form?
No. That wouldn’t work.
Even if I canceled the transformation midway, I’d still suffer from mana depletion and lose consciousness. Reona would kill me while I was incapacitated.
“You may act like a villain, Yoshi-kun, but your true nature is the exact opposite. Unless someone is an outright enemy, you simply can’t abandon them. You’ll even sacrifice your own well-being to save them. You just can’t help yourself, can you? Do you remember what happened in that cave some time ago? Despite the risk of exhausting your mana, you brought back to life the exorcists I’d killed, didn’t you? I’m sorry, but I’ve decided to turn that very trait of yours against you.”
So the fact that I’d try to save the Takasu faction’s people—and transform to do so—had all been part of Reona’s plan.
Not bad. Not bad at all. I had less than forty seconds left. If I didn’t finish this before then, it would all be over. If I ignored the collateral damage, I could probably end the fight right now, but—
“Shizu-Shizu, and the members of the Takasu faction lying all over the ground. I accounted for the fact that you’d be unable to fight as you pleased because you’d be too busy worrying about such insignificant trash. Now, what will you do? Don’t tell me you’ve got another transformation up your sleeve?”
Unfortunately, I didn’t have some convenient power-up waiting in reserve.
But—
I did have a contingency plan.
“Got you!”
A man in a casual kimono burst through the grove, charging straight at Reona with tremendous momentum as he swung his blade.
Do you remember him?
Hatoba Hyoe. He was one of the independent exorcists who’d participated in the operation to rescue Ayano last year. And he wasn’t alone. One after another, short blades bearing talismans embedded themselves in the ground around us.
“Transfer Spell! Hurry!”
“On it!”
“Destination: the cemetery parking lot! All right!”
Voices flew back and forth. A magic circle appeared on the ground, and the unconscious members of the Takasu faction vanished. That made things a whole lot easier. Much appreciated.
I quickly swept my gaze across the surroundings. Nearly ten exorcists had gathered around us. Their appearances varied considerably. Some looked like onmyoji, while others wore business suits.
…I pretend not to notice the one guy wearing nothing but a fundoshi loincloth. They, too, were independent exorcists who’d been involved in the kidnapping incident. In fact, they were among the very people Reona had killed inside that cave.
All right, time to pull back the curtain and explain how this all came together.
First, the Tsuchiyama Service Area.
Once I’d parted ways with Reona and found myself alone, I called Hatoba-san.
—Kaminagi Reona might be in Kyoto. If you know any freelancers who can move out immediately, please get in touch with them. And what do you know? Quite a number of exorcists volunteered for a rematch.
Next, the stretch of road between Tsuchiyama and Kyoto.
I’d received a message from Ayano saying, “Feel free to drag everyone around as much as you need.” So I decided to make full use of that permission and put on a little show.
I borrowed Tokita-san’s cellphone and contacted Hatoba-san again. This time, using the name of the Magetsu family, I issued a formal request to have Shizuku escorted and protected.
No matter how much of a hero you are, you can’t protect absolutely everything all by yourself. When necessary, you bring in more people. That’s a very important lesson to learn. Then, after picking up Shizuku and heading toward the cemetery, I received a telepathic message from Reona at just the right moment.
Lucky me.
An idea struck me.
Why not capture Reona right here and now?
Reona is a wild card whose next move was impossible to predict. She’d said she would betray the old man and his faction, but she hadn’t specified when. There was no benefit in letting such an unpredictable piece roam around freely.
Besides, she’d finally shown her hand. It was the perfect opportunity to take her into custody.
With that in mind, I called Hatoba-san again, and we hastily put together a plan with only the freelancers who could reach the cemetery in time.
Since we’d come up with it on the fly, the strategy was naturally simple. I‘ll keep Reona occupied while the freelancers attacked her from the sides.
The 《Mud》’s fear had been an unforeseen complication, but our surprise attack had arrived just in the nick of time.
All’s well that ends well.
“Rin, Pyo, To, Sha, Kai, Jin, Retsu, Zai, Zen! 《Inner Binding, Outer Binding》!”
“Earth, melt away and seize your target! 《Fire Gives Birth to Earth》…!”
“Cage, protection, error. You shall remain within the confines of this cage! 《Surround, Surround: Imprisoned Bird》!”
Binding spells flew at Reona from every direction, attempting to pin her in place.
“You’ve certainly outdone yourself this time, Yoshi-kun…!”
Reona groaned in frustration. Her katana flashed, slicing through the spells closing in on her.
I didn’t mind. All I needed was a little opening—just over one second—to cast my own spell.
“—《Flame Spell》—《My Flames Are, For Now, a Purifying, Scorching, Annihilating Hammer of Overwhelming Force! Now, Behave Yourself!》”
This is translated by Yume Neiji. Kindly read at yumeneijiworks.com
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