Cobblestone streets, stone lanterns, and rows of traditional wooden buildings. It was a scene that practically screamed ancient capital.
“Though, to be fair, Kyoto doesn’t actually have all that many places that look like the ‘quintessential Kyoto’ tourists tend to imagine.”
Reona remarked.
“From the looks of it, we’re in Gion. If we walk a little farther, we’ll be greeted by the same old, ordinary cityscape full of paid parking lots and apartment buildings.”
“…Thanks for crushing my dreams right out of the gate.”
That was how tourist destinations worked, wasn’t it? Move a little away from the main attractions, and you’d usually find yourself in an ordinary residential neighborhood that looked pretty much like any other.
Personally, I thought the trick to maintaining that vacation feeling was to never stray too far from the main streets.
“Anyway, how long are you planning to follow us? This party only has room for two people.”
“No problem at all. There is only one Yoshito-kun here, accompanied by two female dogs in heat. Ooof, oof!”
Reona raised both arms high above her head and lifted one leg.
Wasn’t that the pose of a rampaging hawk?
Good grief. She really was free-spirited—or rather, her thought processes seemed to have no fixed shape whatsoever. A slime-brained girl, through and through.
Huh? You’re asking why I didn’t just use Mind Hack to turn her back into a normal human being? I’d thought of that, too. In fact, I’d given it a try just a little while ago.
The result? Failure.
It wasn’t so much that the spell didn’t work at all. Rather, even when I tampered with her mind, she returned to her usual self almost immediately. She was a slime in the truest sense of the word. Apparently, it was because “Kannagi’s people are naturally resistant to that sort of thing, and I’m a Pikachu among them.”
…She probably meant the best of the best.
“It’s a bargain to take me along, you know. I’ve been to Kyoto several times for family-related obligations, and my combat ability is full bars—three out of three!”
What era are you living in?
That expression was from the days when flip phones were still the norm!
“Oh, and don’t worry. I have no intention of betraying you. After losing twice, even I have to accept the result. The first time was an unexpected encounter; this time, we clashed after both sides had made full use of their strategies. Since I failed to win either time, repeating the process would probably lead to the same outcome.”
“Didn’t someone interfere just now? Shouldn’t that make it a no-contest?”
“I don’t want to make excuses like that. I consider it a defeat, so it’s a defeat. Case closed.”
Huh. She was surprisingly gracious about losing, at least in that regard.
“That said, I’ve spent plenty of time ambushing people, deceiving them, and generally fighting dirty. So I understand why it would be difficult for you to trust me. Anyway, now I’m in with a good fortune.”
Fukuhauchi? Wait, no—what was I thinking? The phrase ‘In with good fortune!’ was traditionally used to welcome good luck. If anything, Reona was the sort of person you’d want to shout ‘Out with the demons!’ at.
“So, as a special offer, you can enter into a master-servant contract with Reona-chan for practically nothing! You know those spells that restrict someone’s actions? Feel free to use one of those on me. I won’t resist.”
“…The fact that you’re calling it ‘practically nothing’ is what’s worrying me.”
Smartphones were a prime example of that sort of thing. They’d lure you in with a deal like “Free if you don’t upgrade for a certain period!” only to hit you with the follow-up combo of “Time to switch to our latest model!” and suck even more money out of your wallet.
“Well, I’d need you to provide me with meals, a place to sleep, and various other necessities. It would be a problem if you didn’t take care of me.”
“So you’ve been kicked out of my old man’s place, and now you’re planning to mooch off me…?”
“Mmm. It seems you’ve gotten the wrong idea about me, Yoshito-kun.”
Reona pouted slightly, twisting her lips in a sulky expression.
“I wasn’t relying on that group for support, you know? I was living with the Kaminagi family until the kidnapping incident.”
“What did you do after that?”
“I spent about three months training somewhere in Tibet. But when I came back, everyone had fled south. That included my big sister, Makina-neesan, and a man named Naoki Ishirogi. Chasing after them sounded like too much trouble, so I just wandered around overseas and worked as a mercenary. Oh, and don’t worry—I wasn’t selling my body or anything. I’m still pure as the driven snow. I promise, -muru.”
Reona had apparently remembered her little verbal tic and tacked an unnecessary “muru” onto the end of her sentence. If it was something she kept forgetting to do, maybe she should just abandon the gimmick altogether.
“Anyway, just recently, that crow tengu approached me out of the blue. She said, ‘Let’s stick together, since we’re both people Naoki has abandoned.’ …Huh? Wait a minute. Does that mean I’d already been discarded last year?”
Right. I’d been thinking the exact same thing. More importantly, how had she not realized that until now?
“And then that crow tengu tossed me aside too and sent me off to another world… Ughhh, even I’m starting to feel depressed now. You need to take responsibility, you know. Responsibility. I’ve got money, if that’s what you’re worried about. I’ve got a hefty pile of mercenary wages sitting in a Swiss bank account. But withdrawing it sounds like a hassle, so I’d be delighted if you could support me instead.”
“—Lastly, I sincerely wish you continued success and prosperity in all your future endeavors.”
I’d just borrowed the wording from one of those so-called rejection emails you get when a company turns down your job application.
“Praying to Kanna, the Godslayer? This is getting incomprehensible.”
If anyone here was incomprehensible, it was Reona. In more ways than one.
“Anyway, I’d be happy if we could get along. —And seriously, isn’t there something kind of wrong with my personality?”
“You were aware of that…!?”
That was a shocking revelation.
“That’s why I’m a sixteen-year-old cool duck who claims that human relationships are at ground zero and life is boring. Quack-quack.”
“You mean nihilistic, not duck. And there’s not a shred of coolness left in that description.”
“Nice comeback!”
Reona gave me a firm thumbs-up.
“That’s it! That’s exactly it. You can keep up with my energy, and even when I go all out trying to kill you, there’s still an insurmountable wall between us. In this vast world, Yoshito-kun, you’re the only person like that. …Oh, and I’m not speaking metaphorically. I’m dead serious. Like I said, I’ve been wandering all over the place working as a mercenary. They call me C.P.R.—Crazy Psycho Reona. Ahem!”
Judging by the fact that she’d earned herself nicknames like Crazy and Psycho, she’d probably gotten up to all kinds of unsavory things. I could totally picture her casually murdering a client right after collecting her fee. Yeah, that sounded about right.
“So, that’s why I’d really like you to keep me by your side, Yoshito-kun. …Besides…”
Reona brings her lips close to my ear.
“If you stay close, we can pick up right where we left off—anytime you like.”
She breathes a soft puff of air against my skin.
Damn. Her figure is more straight-lined than curvaceous, yet her gestures can sometimes be so strangely alluring—it’s a real problem.
“You just thought, ‘Maybe this isn’t so bad,’ didn’t you?”
Reona smiles, looking triumphant.
“I’ll take that opening in your defenses.”
＊ ＊ ＊
It happened without the slightest hint of bloodlust, and completely caught me off guard. I could say I let my guard down, but the bottom line was that Reona had managed to get the jump on me. I couldn’t believe I’d been caught off guard by her.
“Here we go!”
Reona took my right hand and slipped a ring onto my middle finger—without asking permission, of course. A reddish-purple gemstone set in the ring’s mount glimmered faintly.
And then…
“《Testament》.”
Murmuring the words softly, she fastened something around her own neck. A choker—no, wait. It was a black leather collar. A reddish-purple gemstone was set at the front, identical to the one on the ring.
“Hereby, I, Reona Kannagi, pledge to become your servant”—unilaterally, naturally—“and promise not to harm you or anyone close to you without your permission. If you’d like, let’s have a sword fight about once a week or so. And if you ever get in the mood for something naughty in the future, let’s do all sorts of things together. As for the rest… well, we’ll just see how things go.”
The ring and the collar. The gemstones set into each of them began to glow brightly at the same time.
I’d seen something similar in my previous life, back in that other world. The Master Ring and the Squire Collar. Two halves of a single magical item. Anyone wearing the collar became unable to defy the person holding its matching ring.
So this world had these things, too. More importantly, this was the first time I’d ever seen the servant initiate the contract!
“Wow, I got this as payment for a job a while back, but who knew it’d come in handy in such an unexpected situation? I’m your pushy bride—er, pushy servant! With your abilities, Yoshito-kun, breaking the contract should be a piece of cake. Just keep in mind that if you do, we’ll be launching an all-out, blood-soaked war against each other.”
In fact, Reona was right. Both the ring and the collar were pretty impressive magic items, but as far as I was concerned, nullifying their effects wouldn’t be particularly difficult. That said, the situation was more or less like having a wild horse finally settle down and walk into its stable. There wasn’t much point in deliberately driving it back out again.
If anything, maybe I should strengthen the contract. Knowing Reona, she’d probably find some bizarre way to cancel out the collar’s power.
“Mhm, mhm! I like how you’re not letting your guard down. I’ll award you one Super Reona-chan Point! Collect five, and you’ll get… something amazing!”
“The contract means you can’t attack me, right?”
“Oh, I’ll attack you all right. Sexually that is.”
Please don’t.
“By the way, you can substitute one date or one sword fight for a point, too.”
Well, I supposed it was kind of like taking a dog for a walk.
“…Anyway, I’m steadily setting up the flags for the Reona-chan ending. But, Shizu-pon, are you still alive back there?”
Reona spun around to look behind her. The three of us had been walking side by side, but at some point, Shizuku had quietly fallen back, keeping her distance.
“Huh? A-ah, yeah.”
Apparently, she hadn’t expected Reona to speak to her. She answered awkwardly, looking thoroughly flustered.
“You okay? Getting out of here is probably going to be a long haul, so don’t hesitate to tell us if you get tired.”
“N-no! I’m really fine, Mas—… Yoshito-kun.”
She’d called me something different from usual. There was clearly something wrong with Shizuku. She seemed hesitant, almost as though she’d put some distance between us.
“Is it harder for you to act normally when someone your own age is around?”
Reona shrugged, looking thoroughly exasperated.
“Come to think of it, Yoshito-kun, have you ever seen Shizu-pon at school?”
I shook my head. Shizuku didn’t seem particularly eager to talk about herself, so I didn’t really know much about her.
“I went to the same middle school as her, and, well… how should I put it? She’s practically a different person. She doesn’t wear that long coat or wrap herself in bandages, either. She wears glasses and keeps a low profile. You know, the type who can’t find a partner when the teacher tells everyone to pair up, or who ends up as the odd one out when there are three people together…”
Ouch. That hit a little too close to home.
When a group of three turns into a pair plus one, the odd person quietly disappears. A mysterious case of human disappearance. And the other two just keep chatting away, completely oblivious to what’s happened.
Modern society really is a terrifyingly cruel place. Well, in reality, the odd person had simply fled because they couldn’t bear the awkwardness anymore.
That person was me, back in my previous life, when I had lived in this world. Please don’t call me socially inept.
“Even her whole ‘I am Shizuku, the Fallen Angel with One Silver Wing!’ routine is just a one-off performance she puts on when nobody else is around.”
Reona continued exposing Shizuku’s secrets without the slightest mercy.
“Apparently, she gets all excited around exorcists who are quite a bit older than her, like Hatoba-san and the others. But the moment someone her own age shows up—someone like me—she immediately shrinks into her shell. …Honestly, why does she insist on pretending to be the sensible one?”
Reona let out a long sigh.
As for Shizuku, she was trembling and turning so red that she looked ready to explode at any moment. Her eyes were practically overflowing with tears.
Uh, well…
“Y-your glasses look would probably be cute, too, Shizuku. Yeah.”
“I understand… I-I’ll show you next time….”
Shizuku lowered her head.
I’d been trying to cheer her up and smooth things over, but somehow I’d gotten a completely different result.
“Yoshito-kun, Yoshito-kun! Actually, I’m a glasses heroine, too.”
I could’ve sworn I’d just heard something that sounded like an auditory hallucination. Nah, must’ve been my imagination.
“So this is the infamous neglected-play treatment… twitch, twitch.”
I really thought she ought to stop making sound effects out loud. Otherwise, she’d end up like some maid I knew whose marriage prospects had been delayed indefinitely.
Anyway…
“Reona, do you actually dislike Shizuku?”
“Not at all! I absolutely adore her. I’d say I love her almost as much as I love you, Yoshito-kun. That’s why it’s so frustrating to see her lingering halfway on the side of normalcy instead of fully embracing her true self— Oh, looks like we’ve arrived.”
Arrived where?
For that matter, where exactly had we been heading?
We were in an alternate dimension modeled after Kyoto. We’d just been wandering around at random, hoping to find a way out.
“Actually, I’d been subtly steering us toward the Kamo River. I thought we could have a little water-play scene with soaking-wet clothes and all the fanservice that comes with them.”
But things hadn’t gone according to plan. You know the Kamo River, right? It flows through eastern Kyoto and is famous as a dating spot for the bizarre phenomenon in which couples sit at perfectly even intervals along its banks.
And there, beside the river, were shadows arranged at perfectly even intervals.
Muscular silhouettes. Each with a single, magnificent horn sprouting from its head.
There was no mistaking them for anything other than demons. They were sitting on the ground with their knees drawn up, staring blankly at the flowing water with lifeless eyes.
What the hell was this depressing scene?
“T-this is…!”
“You know what this is, Raiden? No, wait, Reona.”
“I don’t.”
I was so done with this girl.
“Just kidding! Of course I know. I looked into it before, and apparently, 《The Realm of Three Hindrances and Four Demonic Influences》 is also a place where a practitioner seals away the souls of those they’ve killed. In other words, it’s their own private hell.”
Hmm, hmm. Interesting.
“Which means those demons were probably defeated by Ajiro Miya—the crow tengu.”
“So they’re depressed because they’re still traumatized by their defeat?”
“That’s probably it.”
Nodding, Reona waved enthusiastically at them. The demons seemed to notice her and waved back.
It was a strangely surreal and peaceful sight.
Eh?
Why are they getting up one after another and starting to approach us?
“This is a problem.”
Reona frowned.
“Apparently, those demons are under Ajiro Miya’s control.”
“And that means…?”
“She might have ordered them to kill us.”
Well, that was troublesome. Although…
“Wouldn’t nothing have happened if you hadn’t waved at them, Reona?”
“..”
Why are you looking away?
“I’m kidding, I’m kidding. Besides, Ajiro Miya intends to finish us off anyway, so we’d have ended up fighting sooner or later. Oh, Yoshito-kun, you don’t need to lift a finger. For this one, Shizuku and I will form the Dynamic Duo of Two Female Dogs and show these guys who’s boss!”
Although one of those two was more of a rabid dog.
Where was animal control when you needed them?
This is translated by Yume Neiji. Kindly read at yumeneijiworks.com
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